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whathefuck!? December 30, 2008

Posted by demeonte in Uncategorized.
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sonfoabitchicantsleepwhatthefuckswrongwithmethisthinghasnoperiods!!!! im too hyper need to vent, need to do something need to go nuts and write something complettly random and inconsiderate… how about vals a prick and no onel ikes him? nah thats something everything will not agree with, told you i cant sleep got a lot of energy in me what the fuck is wrong with me, why dont i just jackoff and hope for the best, well i could do that but then i would probly pass out with the strain of all the sperm going out of my sytem. wow, that was more graphic then you needed huh? well lets get this over with shall we?

first thing thats on my mind is the fact that i havent been talking with …with… that one gal that i was crushing on then stoped for some reason… weird about that thing aint it. acutally thats been on my mind for a couple of days now.

maybe its just me being me, but i wouldve thought that after forming a stupid patern i wouldve gotten stuck in it with christina, but i guess i kinda mellowed myself out there a good long time. chistina, how i think i fell for you during the time that i did, but i told you my feelings and you kindly rejected them, and then i got it in my thick head that your just going to be a friend, that was cool with me. i dunno, maybe i was just tired of the whole rigamarole, where i feel for the asb president and then i went on this long stupid rant about oh i how i would part the heavens or someother crazy crap something about greek god of love or something. i dont really remember. but then ianother stupid thought came to mind, it was just a thought mind you so theres not really any intent behind it.

i kinda…well totaly entertained the daydream of that day in the asb office where i told her that i loved her… this was beforei met caasi so there is no real harm in writing about htis. plus im going to anyways. whether i like it or not. love you muuuuch caasi! anyways, i was in the asb office and i asked her if i could kiss her and she said yes. which lead to wierdly enough a sex fantasy in the office. which mightve been really weird slash awesome had it actually happened. because i know that it might never happen, maybe it would im just getting all worked up over nothing. maybe its just the energy coursing through my viens at the moment.

but in anycase… wow im just writing about this one thing arnt i? and i keep mispelling words! YAY MOTHERFUCKERS! nope didnt mispell that word. anyways, i think there was a point in my mind at the day where i truly did want to just kiss christina on the lips, but im kinda glad i didnt, and i am very happy to report that i am happy that it didnt happen or else i never wouldve met my love. lol. wow, im getting nervous over confessing something in a blog? congratu fucking lations people. your witnessing the birth of something thats nervous from the get go, a tiny nervous thing that likes coffee.

a poodle? gaurd dog? bull? redbull! i like redbull. i think it kinda tastes like medicine and thats cool with me. anything that tastes like the backwards part of a perverted docs medicine cabinet suits me just fine. aberforth dumbledoor, dumbells and broomhicks. hickeys! vampires! zombies! spitting out any random thing that pops into my mind and hoping thatll make sense and connect with the other stuff before the freedom train makes a stop at kfc to put a… breath you magnificent bastard you!

enough with the bad jokes, its like i cant stop writing and this is the prize! more writing! i think that its just nervous stimuli from the brain coersing my fingers to type whatever my mind thinking at the moment. like hot midget anal sex toys that make disnet land look like a carnival of carnage. wow… aint that pretty to imagine. a bunch of short short people with hotpants getting it on with a plastic pickle attached to the business end of a screwdriver set on “WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT DOING IN THERE!!!?” yes my mind is completly fucked up at the moment. maybe ill just run out of things to right, fall asleep while jacking off to my lady loves image and hope for the best damned orgasm and man can hope for. and to quote a old favorite of mine.

“one of these days alice, bang zoom! straight to the moon!’ and thats in relation to how hard i freaking ejaculate. you people really should be reading something else at this point in time. because if youve stuck with me through this far into the blog, youve either got a strong stomach for weird crap or your just bred as hell. even as im writing this i can feel the demons in my heart and mind laughing the shiny spiky little tails off wondering what the fuck is going on with my head at the mometn.

well i can tell you this much folks, a lot of weird crazy crap. did you know that there are blogging siteso ut there with a limit to what you can put in your blogs? its just fucking insane, like a chinese blogging site, the amount of matter that can be seen like porn is just not there. youknow, that would actually be kinda interesting to see a pornstars blog, just once idl ike there to be news that some girls going to be doing a guys with a huge dong and its oging all the way in and shes complaining buts the stiching from the last guy hasnt really healed up yet. this is real stuff folks, really really reall stuff. i wantched a documentary on the lives of porn stars called, goin down in the valley. mightve been more interesting had they actualy sown something.

then theres the fact that ive had to make a third youtube channel. yep this is the stuff of dreams right here folks. youtube, sex dreams, jerking off, midgets, making fun of vals job, my love life, past loves and really disturbing stuff, like seeing a fat person in a string bikini with really really bad back hair. and jumping up and down. yes that would be the hairy fat lady that doesnt have a goatee burning from up her vagina….. and im spent… not in that way you sick person you. god i hope i didnt write anything embarrassing in here…. well, now to post the thing and hope for the best.

later! love you caasi! cant wait to see you again!

myspace, google virus, biden/palin, obama mccain, and whatever. October 10, 2008

Posted by enigmatt in drunk.
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man oh man! welcome to enigmatts rants, im enigmatt and the little girl winking at the camera will tell you that she sees russia from her tea house. of course it relies mostle on the hubbles inability to see galaxys upclose with out raping the national budget. whyed we put a man on the moon for? golkf? why dont i beleive that? oh yeah, lol… its because every time bush opens his mouth, obama and mccain argue over stupid crap that would make lisa marree cry in her sleep while micheal jackson banged the cub scouts of america. jesus jiuce anyone?

so by this point youve got to be asking yourself this one extremely important question… because the world of polotics is just too fucking funy for eddie murphy to get it on with baby doll t shirts whil masterbating to doogey housers l’life on the road’.  ”WHERE HAVE ALL THE COOKIES GONE?” yes thats right folks, for every ten dollars you give to me, ill not only not give it to charity, but ill spend it on porn.

myspace…this really chaps my ass, because i usually do these things on myspace and not word press. but ever since the google virus hit, and if you dont know what that s, then your more clueless then a half sober lionel richie beating the crap out of a metal pipe with his head. the google virus is a pain in myspaces butt. not only because it just turns your ass over to google, but it also messes up you hard drive like a little bitch. the fact that millions of teens everywhere are going to have fits of rage  with wich the likes preschool teachers have never seen before because of this, is more then enough reason to just let them try to login. lol. mua ha ha… evil i am.

the vice presidential debates were more interesting to watch then a more brutal version of the three stogges marathon. ony because i was completely expecting palin to just fuck the whole thing up with her saying of “dont ya know?” “you betcha!” “i have respect for your argument” heres something i never really expected to happen though. in the last half of the debate, it went from two people intelligently attacking each other jugulars to..well… two slightly less intelligent people attacking each others jugulars. like we really needed another reminder of how fucked up they made indiana jones. they just raped his ass, over and over and over and over again.  ALIENS DONT BELONG IN INDIANA JONES DAMNINt!!!!!!!

speaking of which, the presidential debates were a little less entertaining to watch then a bad porno being shot with crack heads shanking eah other in the pussys with rabid weasels. yeah… it was that bad. all in all the more hilerous versions were on cnn. that little line was just the most entertaining part of the whole thing. mccain spoke, line go down, obama speak, line go up! LOL! folks i hate to be the bearer of bad news here, but doesnt anybody NOT pay attention to the incredibly inept ranking of the stock market? or do we just like seeing marketeers run around screaming things like “OH MY FUCKING GOD WERE ALL GONNA DIE LIKE A BAD MOVIE REMAKE OF SOMETHING MORE HORRENDOUS THEN SEEING JOAN RIVERS ON TV!!!!!!” and that my friends is a fate wosre then death. because joan rivers will eat your childrens feet, then make them dance forever in a pit of broken glass made of discarded botox syringes.

to really see the horror of the new google virus, you have to get inside steve irwins head, then promptly run out screaming something the lines of ” FUCK THIS SHIT! IM WATCHING JOEY!” because folks, the inside of steve irwins head is nothing more then beastiality tapes, with him screwing a gecko and being the bitch in the relationship. in fact, i think i can hear him doing his chihuahua. i was asleep last night and amidst the fainting music that constantly complimented the rabid monkey balls, that constantly hammered away at the cheese bunkers mineral deposits. i was whisked away to a magical place where  the only punishment in the world was getting sodomized by a blue whales dick in the ear. and most people dont live through something like that.

i found out that while perusing the dick cheney esque friend shooting videos, that humans as a whole are nothing more then god fearing idiots with rifles in our hands, waiting to be shot in the head by the god fearing idiot with a rifle in his hands, who happened to be standing right next to us telling us that his problem was firing the damned thing. like we really needed help figuring that out. there were far more sinister problems in the road to recovery, and im going to rant about that next. the road to fucking recovery. because she is hot and i would fuck her in the ass with the head of a baseball bat.

the raod to revorey in the econic crisis isnt merly something that the national debt wont decrease or reverse with. in fact, the national debt is a jewish reminder that we fucked over the britains when we declared ourselves tax exempt from there tea smacking ways, and formed our own little crackden in the world. the road to revery is merely a stepping stone to a world where black and whites and asian and arabs can get together for a nice game of “who the fuck killed the president this time?” because as we all know, bush needs to be attacked in the head with a five foot dildo and called a stupid mother fucker for getting a movie made about him and dick cheney having lunch together. can you fucking imagine that? bush and cheney eating lunch? I CANT BELEIVE THEY EAT LUNCH!!!!!!!

IF ANYTHING I COULDNT IMAGINE ANYONE with more gall or idiosy making a movie about one of the worst presidents in the united states. nay mr. bush, not only the states, the fucking world. because life itself cant be explained when youve got your head in other countrys asses. and maybe thats just what this country needs, another head to ass president who thinks he knows what the flying fuck hes doing. of course this can only be alleviated by the fact that more shows from the sixties are getting a face lift that would have mellissa richars screaming in fits of rage as well as physical shame. im sorry darling, but theres only so much plastic surgery you can do to that vagina of yours. and whatever you do, dont add fake eyes.